The Flirtation Experiment | Book Review

Tomorrow will be 3 years since my husband and I got married. Tied the knot. Said goodbye to the single life. I’ve never been happier or more fulfilled but that’s not to say things have been perfect. I didn’t come into marriage knowing how to be open and vulnerable. I come from a culture where women work hard so it’s still a challenge for me to prioritize playing with my spouse over the housework that never seems to end. There is a lot that I still have to learn about being a good wife so I was pleased when Lisa from TLC Book Tours offered me a review copy of The Flirtation Experiment, written by Lisa Jacobson and Phylicia Masonheimer, two Christian women who decided to challenge themselves to amp up the excitement in their marriages, and from whom we can all learn a thing or two.

The book is written with the ladies alternately tackling one focal point in each of the thirty chapters. Phylicia has been married for seven years and has three young children; Lisa has been a pastor’s wife for almost thirty years. Their different life stages give good balanced wisdom as these women apply Biblical teachings to their own experiences and share lessons learned and advice on how readers can use their tips to celebrate the gift of their marriages as well. Lisa, the more mature woman, tackles the subject of connection, an innate need that we all have from creation, and how even the well-oiled machine of a three decade marriage can benefit from playing a favorite song and sharing why it is meaningful to you. In the Refuge chapter, she also shares how she continues to learn about her husband, through using her intuition and providing a place where he can be vulnerable knowing she will affirm him. Phylicia, the younger woman and probably the one I can better identify with being in a similar state of marital youth, explores topics like seeking friendship and intimacy with your spouse, and setting up phone boundaries to be more generous with whatever alone time we share with our husbands.   

There is a lot of focus on the Shulamite woman who expresses love and joy and desire for her partner in Song of Songs, but The Flirtation Experiment also explores lots of other relevant Biblical passages with a view to learning how better to value ourselves and our partners, to acknowledge and erase hurt that may have been built up over years of certain needs not being met, and to focus on celebrating love in our everyday lives. There is a lot of practical advice for little things and grand gestures that readers can copy or use as inspiration for how to surprise their partners. The book also comes with a caveat, mentioned in the introduction and repeated throughout the book, that these tips are meant to help make good marriages better, but The Flirtation Experiment is not a substitute for the professional help that is required if one’s partner is manipulative or abusive. 

The Flirtation Experiment is a wholesome, inviting and inspiring read. The personal stories that the authors share are ones that most of us can probably identify with for the missteps we may have made and after our initial cringe, what we want to do better in the future. The book seeks to address why married people might find themselves looking outside of their relationships for the fulfillment that a loving marriage should provide – getting absorbed with tasks or entertainment instead of focusing on our partners and our partnership. However, it invites the reader to make the first step, and perhaps the next several as well, learning how to be a good wife, knowing that the man who vowed forever to us, will eventually reciprocate in his own way.

Many thanks to Lisa Munley from TLC and Thomas Nelson Publishing for providing me this complimentary copy of The Flirtation Experiment. I was not otherwise compensated and the above review reflects my honest opinion about the book.

Book Details
  • Title: The Flirtation Experiment
  • Author: Lisa Jacobson and Phylicia Masonheimer
  • Format: Hardcover 
  • Pages: 224
  • Publisher: Thomas Nelson Publishing 
  • Publication Date:
Publisher Synopsis

From popular Christian voices Lisa Jacobson and Phylicia Masonheimer, The Flirtation Experiment inspires you to strengthen your marriage with a fun, unexpected approach that leads to the depth, richness, and closeness you desire.

Romance novels, Hallmark movies . . . the immense demand for romantic stories reveals a deep, unsatisfied longing that can be found in many marriages, but does it have to be that way? Is it possible that the best marriage has to offer can grow, rather than fade after you say “I do”? Lisa and Phylicia say, “Absolutely yes!”

So what is the secret to a happy, thriving, loving marriage, where the fire of romance and close friendship do not fade? While The Flirtation Experiment includes the frisky side of marriage, it’s far more than a good romp. By degrees, each chapter takes you to a deeper place, covering themes every beautiful marriage has in common, such as covenant, healing, and hope.

About the Authors

Lisa Jacobson is an author, a podcaster, and the founder of, an online community of Christian women authors who write on marriage, home, family, and faith–a powerful voice for biblical womanhood. She is the author of the bestselling 100 Ways to Love Your Husband. Lisa and her husband, Matt, are also cohosts of the popular FAITHFUL LIFE podcast. They live in the beautiful Pacific Northwest where they have enjoyed raising their eight children

Phylicia Masonheimer is a national bestselling author, speaker, and host of the Verity Podcast. Her blog – Every Woman a Theologian- teaches Christians how to know what they believe and live it boldly. Theology touches every area of life, so Phylicia addresses cultural questions through the lens of church history and sound biblical interpretation. She lives in northern Michigan with her husband and three children.

2 Comments Add yours

  1. I know their book is for married couples, but some of the advice seemed like it good also apply to any relationship that you have with people.


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